Random Friday

1.  This morning before work, before the sun came up and melted energy into lethargy, I finished cleaning out the hen house.  What a nasty dusty job.  My clothes were covered in that fine chicken dust that covers the hen house floor and rafters in silt.  I filled the nesting boxes with clean shavings and spread more on the floor.  It's hard to think about winter when the days are a scorching 100F, but the hen house is ready nonetheless. Attila the hen is still broody and still aggressively protecting all the eggs (they all lay in the same nesting box).

2.  I've been teaching Kersey a new skill and command.  In the evenings after chores, I flip my kayak right side up on the front porch, put a dog treat in my pocket and call Kersey.  I've taught her that the command "boat" means to jump in the boat.  Last night she had it down, sitting calmly while the boat rocked back and forth.  Her life jacket came in the mail so we were set.  All that was left was for me to get in the boat with her.  Unfortunately, that part didn't work so well.  Kersey was very good but there just isn't room for my legs and an 80 lb stocky dog.  Kersey has hip problems so she doesn't sit straight.  She sits at an angle, with her fanny jutting out one direction and her front legs the other.  There is not enough room between my legs for her to sit; and no room for me to paddle if she stands.  So, she lay across my legs and I rubbed her belly before calling it quits.  She won't be a kayaking dog after all which is a disappointment, but we will still take her to the lake for swimming.  And now she has a life jacket so she can swim for a really long time.

3.  Lucy has designated me as her personal masseuse.  She follows me all over the pasture, standing between me and the muck cart; standing between me and piles of manure; standing between me and anything else until I turn and walk to her.  I have a space bubble that she is not allowed to enter so she stands at the edge of that imaginary circle and looks at me with intent.  I walk up to her and then stand just in front of her chest.  Using my stubby fingernails, I rub the underside of her neck, up towards her throat latch and down to her chest.  She stretches, and sighs and drops her head on my shoulder.  She likes to have her belly and butt scratched too, but her neck is by far her favorite location.

4.  Temperatures are supposed to drop tomorrow by 20 degrees due to a storm moving into Northern California from Washington and Oregon.  The far north-western corner of the State is expected to get rain; we will not see precipitation -- just some wind and cooler (80s) temperature.  Brett and I plan to ride Saturday.  On Sunday, Sandy Savage is coming up with her fiance (congratulations!) for lunch and we will work with Lucy in the morning.  Lucy is still very sticky/resistant on her right lead canter so I want Sandy's opinion on whether I need to have the other hock injected.

5.  Winston is for sale.  Although his junior rider loves him to death, he just isn't cut out for dressage.  Winston needs to belong to a strong bold eventing rider.  He loves to jump, he loves the trail, and he has a lot of talent.  He's been winning at dressage shows -- but he gets bored.  To be successful in dressage you need a horse who has nice gaits, yes, but even more importantly you have to have a willing partner.  Winston isn't willing.  He gets bored and then he gets naughty.  It isn't fun for either him or his owner.  So, if any of you eventers out there are looking for a strong horse, or know of someone who is, take a look at Winston.  He's on the DreamHorse website -- a search for Winston Hanovarian Appaloosa brings him right up.

Schooling at Aspen Meadows -- 5-ish years old

More schooling...

Stealing Brett's hat at the Thermal *** show - he nailed his tests despite the freezing temps and icy wind.

At a show earlier this month, with his current owner.  He won all his classes.

A Winston Update

I see updates and photos periodically on FB of Winston and his new owner, Nicole.  They were in a show this past weekend.  I love this picture of them.

They did great.  Nicole posted that they cleaned up with scores in the upper 60s and low 70s.  Four blue ribbons.

I asked her if I could post an update and use her picture.  This is what she had to say:

"Today, we rode training levels 2 and 3 because I wanted to qualify for a lower level in junior championships.  He is definitely an "appy," with many of his antics present, but when he wants to be good, he is amazing.  I've never been happier than I am now.  Next year, he'll be moving up the levels and hopefully be starting 2nd level by the end of 2016."

Is that awesome or what?!  It was hard for me to reach the decision to sell Winston.  He was truly amazing when he was good.  But, I couldn't handle the appy-tude.  I'm glad he and Nicole found each other, that they have a great trainer, and that they are doing so well.

Happy trails Nicole and Winston!

Good Riddance

...to 2014. I'm hoping for a quiet 2015.

2014 was a year of loss for me. The largest, most overwhelming, loss was that of my mom in February. I am still haunted by the memory of the days in the hospital with her that last week, of wrestling with her wishes to go - against my want of her to stay, in the quiet nights while I sat in the room alone with her. I find my eyes welling with tears, still, on my evening commute home when my mind drifts to thoughts normally shared in our frequent phone calls. Camille and I have a whole new understanding of pelicans flying close by -- Grandma is with us in spirit.

We lost Sedona in the summer after her battle with cancer. Sedona lived a long happy life and her final demise was sudden and clear. We did not have to wonder about whether it was time; one morning she couldn't walk and her eyes told us it was time. She was a great dog and part of our family fabric.

There was also the loss of Winston. It was difficult for me to accept that I was not the rider he needed. We lost confidence in each other and we couldn't find our way back. Selling him to a brave young rider was the right thing to do but it wasn't an easy decision to make.

Thanksgiving was difficult. There was hurt and, hopefully, some healing. It was painful regardless. That's all I'm gonna say on that subject.

The year wasn't all bad, of course. Lucy and I found each other and we bonded immediately. She fixed my tendency to curl and lean forward in a matter of weeks; something that years of lessons failed to do. If I lean, at all, she rushes. If I'm straight and balanced, so is she. The reward for both of us is huge. When I ride Lucy, I am in a place of relaxed joyfulness. She is truly a gift (thank you Victoria and Sandy).

Brett underwent successful knee replacement surgery. The recovery was very different from the time he had his first knee done. He had much less pain, greater range of motion almost immediately and healed in record time. I can hardly keep up with him now.

Kyle graduated from college and started working in San Francisco. I have successfully launched my eldest child -- and it feels great. I'm very proud of both of my children; of who they have become and how they live their lives. Camille is on her way and I expect a successful launch, in a few years, with her as well.

Here's a big raspberry to 2014 and a hearty welcome to 2015.

Kersey misses Sedona but being an inside dog in the winter has definite benefits.

Winston Update

Today I received an email from Winston's new owner and I immediately asked if I could share it with you.  Winston is doing great.  This is what she had to say.

Winston trailered to his new home, while eating his lunch.  Nicole was at school so I walked him around and introduced him to all his new herd buddies, then he rested in his new stall.  He seemed to settle right in and patiently waited for me to go pick Nicole up from school.  When Nicole came in the barn and saw his darling face looking out over the stall door she broke into tears, sobbing.  She was so overwhelmed to actually see him at the barn she has been at for 10 years.  I think Winston truly understands Nicole is his new person.  He nuzzles and sniffs her hair and is very lovable.  Within the hour several of the girls Nicole rides with showed up at the barn to awe at him.

They also sent me a picture of Nicole and Winston on the day that they decided to buy him -- the same Monday where I watched them together, loved how they were bonding (like it was meant to be), and crossed my fingers.  Don't they both look happy?

As my friend Heather said, "Every horse needs a young girl at least once in their lives."

It Feels Like Summer

I know summer is still more than two weeks away, officially, but I'm telling you: summer is here.  The days are hot.  The early mornings are nice and cool so we get up early and ride then.  The afternoon is a total loss.  The temperatures climb and climb and climb, reaching their peak at around 5pm.

Passage follows the shade, whether that is in my garden or under the butterfly bush.

The geldings spend their time under the oak trees.

And the mares are spending the middle of the day in the barn.  They don't have trees in their pasture and the large oak nearest their fence doesn't throw shade until later in the day.

Lucy is settling in well.  She seems to like it here at Oak Creek Ranch.

And Winston left for his new home on Monday.  I'm sure he's loving the attention he is getting from his new owner.

Another Great Lesson on Lucy

Monday morning, before the temperatures reached the mid-90s, I took a lesson on Lucy.  She was a little sluggish to start -- it may not have been 90, but it was warm.  It took a little bit of work to get her going but once she was warmed up, she was eager to work.  The arena was crowded with lessons and other riders trying to beat the heat so we worked at the far end.  Brett tried to take pictures but between the distance and the darkness in the covered arena, most of them didn't come out.

We continued working on Lucy's trot.  First getting her relaxed and stretching.  Next practicing our transitions and making sure she was focused and listening to me.  Last we worked on getting her to collect for a few strides and then go back to lengthening.  I focused, felt her energy and responded with a soft ask -- and she gave me back more than I hoped for.

We ended the lesson with canter work.  Again, an improvement in both the quality of the canter and our relaxation as we moved together.  After a few times around, Sandy said, "Okay you can come back to trot."  And I said, "I don't want to."  I was feeling an amazing connection with Lucy; both physically in my hands and seat as well as in our focus and thought.  I didn't want it to end.  As we walked on a loose rein, I tried to explain to Sandy but got emotional instead.  She laughed and said she had heard the catch in my voice.

Sandy thinks Lucy and I have made great progress in this past month.  She is surprised at how much we have accomplished.  I'd have to agree.

As we were putting Lucy away, Winston's girl arrived to ride him again.  She wanted to get him out, tack him up, lunge him and ride him.  She wanted to do everything herself.  He dove into the halter and sat quietly, with his lower lip twitching in enjoyment, while she groomed him.  We watched her ride for a few minutes -- harmonious happiness.  Fingers and toes crossed.  Vet check is next.

Random Five Friday

1. Another hot and humid day today. Brett and I tried to sit on the front porch with a glass of wine but we didn't last long. The mosquitos and flies were buzzing furiously, landing on Brett's cheek, on my arms and on the dogs. We gave up -- gulped our wine and started on the evening chores. I remember backpacking in the Sierras when I was a kid -- and hiding in my tent to get away from the mosquitos. This is our first spring at Oak Creek Ranch; now I know what to expect -- beauty and bugs.

2. Sedona barely touched her breakfast this morning and refused her dinner tonight. She wouldn't even eat her raw meat. I managed to get a small piece, hiding two pain pills, down her throat. She chewed slowly, swallowed, and looked at me mournfully. I'm hoping its the heat and not pain that is causing her to lose her appetite. I'm more than a little bit worried. She will be twelve this summer and we've had her since she was a puppy.

This picture was taken last fall.  No leaves on the ground now.

3. Winston update: Sandy said that Winston hasn't been in a bad mood for weeks. He's been a lot of fun to ride. I'm happy and it makes me wistful for the days that I rode him regularly and thought he was the most fun horse ever. He clearly needs regular work -- which I can't provide. Sandy was able to work through his resistance and that combined with his increased fitness, has brought back the horse I loved when we were living at Aspen Meadows.

Having fun at Aspen Meadows

4. There has been a steady trickle of people calling about Winston. Most of them are attracted by his color and are not strong enough to ride him. Yesterday, an older woman came to try him -- looking for a seasoned, steady trail horse. Ummm, no. She pretty quickly decided that he was too much horse for her. I'm not sure how she got "bombproof trail horse" out of his ad which clearly states he needs a strong rider to deal with his strong personality.

5. Today a young girl, maybe 13 or 14, came with her mother and aunt to try Winston. They have an appaloosa at home, love him, but he's retired at the ripe old age of 30. The daughter rides dressage with a trainer. Winston would be in full time work. I wasn't at the barn when they came, but I heard that the girl rode Winston very well. I also heard that when she finished riding him, in the arena and out on the small trail that circles the paddocks, she couldn't stop smiling. She covered Winston in kisses and he ate it up. Winston loves attention more than just about anything and he got a lot of it from this girl. Fingers crossed....

Random Five Friday

1. In the past few months, we've had birds in the house a couple of times. We find them in the breakfast area, looking out the window at the garden. Then they fly around the house before I'm able to catch them (in a towel) and take them outside. Brett thought they were coming in the laundry room door so we have been careful to always close it tightly behind us. A few days ago, another bird got in. Brett could hear it inside the wood stove. The doors to the stove were pushed out a bit but the bird was still inside. He didn't want to mess with trying to catch the bird so he waited for me to get home from work. By then, the bird was gone. Maybe back up the chimney? Regardless, we had a new spark arrestor installed today so we won't have anymore birds careening around the house leaving splats of white poop on the furniture.

2. Our neighbor across the road has sheep. I always think of the Crazy Sheep Lady when I see them out in her big pasture. A week or so ago, I noticed four or five lambs in the adjoining pasture, munching on grass and loving life. We found out that Tuesday night something killed one of the lambs. It was either a mountain lion or coyotes. The carcass was left behind so our neighbors are leaning towards blaming coyotes. I worry about our goats and am thankful for Sedona, who barks at any animal who sets foot on the property.

3. Winston is still hanging out in his paddock, training with Sandy, and waiting for a new home. There have been quite a few inquiries and some of them very interested. However, none have been appropriate. Most recently an older, timid woman who loves appaloosas wanted to rescue him -- riding him a few times a week. When Sandy talked to her about his need for clear boundaries, regular work and his sensitivity, the woman didn't understand at all. Another person sounded very promising initially -- she was looking for an eventing prospect for her 17 year old daughter (yes!) but the horse also had to be safe for her husband, who has never ridden before, to ride (no!).

4. I had a lesson on Lucy today. Mixed results. Our warm-up stretching trot was much improved. Our haunches-in were a total disaster. Lucy can do them in her sleep but my brain got all tangled up in my fingers and my legs were crossed and confused. After that fiasco, we tried to canter. Lucy was good considering how frustrated she must have been with me. She didn't rush but she wasn't interested in transitioning down to trot either. Sandy told me to breathe out in the downward transition. Nope. Breathe out more. Louder. More. Finally, she came down. I was exhaling like Darth Vador. Sandy said "May the Force be with you" and we called it a day. Next time we'll work on canter before my brain gets twisted in a knot and while Lucy is relaxed.

5. Brett and I are going down to San Diego this weekend. My mom wanted to have her ashes scattered at sea. My brother lives in San Diego and has a sail boat there. My mom loved going out on his boat. On Mothers Day we will sail out on my brother's boat and scatter the ashes. Kyle and Camille are driving down tomorrow morning. My father has been in San Diego all week, staying in a small cottage on the pier, where he and my mother vacationed every May. My sister and my niece flew down yesterday. We will all be there to carry her ashes out of the harbor, and scatter them into the open sea.

The blog will be quiet for the next few days. Happy Mothers Day to all you moms out there. Its going to be a bittersweet one for me.

Random Five Friday

This week isn't going to be a very random set of five.  The questions and comments I received about my decision to sell Winston were overwhelmingly supportive.  Thank you all so much for that.  There is so much wisdom amongst my followers; thank you for sharing your wisdom with me.

1.  TeresaA suggested that I consider a baroque horse when I start looking for a new horse.  Auke, a horse I had before Jackson, was a Friesian.  He was beautiful but we weren't a good fit.  Baroque horses also tend to be quite expensive and I'm not going to be in the market for a pricey mount.  If I could find a Quarter horse that is built uphill, I'd buy it in a heartbeat.

2.  Val, along those lines, noted that I was very happy with Jackson.  Of all the horses I've had the pleasure of knowing, Jackson is still my favorite.  My heart horse.  If I could find a horse with the sweetness, heart, and try of Jackson -- with strong feet and a straight body, I would be in heaven.  Jackson is "just" a Paint horse with crummy feet but he made me smile everytime I rode him.  He still makes me smile.

3.  Kate and a few others made the observation that while Winston and I aren't a good fit, I did give him a good start.  Kate's comment that Winston may well be as frustrated with me as I am with him hit home.  I am sure she is right.  I don't know if Dom still reads my blog, but if I could find a local clone of her it would be the perfect fit.  She's a brave and sensitive rider; just what he needs.  She would have his number in a way that I don't.  He needs someone to take him over fences and gallop down the trail, in addition to dressage.  He needs variety to be happy.  And when he's happy, he's a lot of fun.

4.  Many of you share in my transition to different goals; away from competition to a focus on harmonious, peaceful riding at home.  I'm glad I'm not alone in this.  I thought maybe I was; that I was a wimp and you would all desert me.

5.  Inger asked if Sedona is still with us.  Yes!  Sedona is doing great.  I took the dogs on a three mile walk last night after work.  Kersey, the youngster, struggled along on her short legs panting up the hills.  Sedona trotted easily the whole way; up hills and down, ears pricked, tail up, watching the deer, wild turkeys, quail and trying to chase squirrels.  She is still on pain meds but has put on weight and is happily patrolling the property.

Throwing in the Towel

I've decided to sell Winston.  I made the decision Tuesday afternoon.  Last night I felt discouraged and tired, but relieved.  Today I have felt overwhelming relief.  The weight of worrying about Winston largely gone.  When I talked to Sandy about my decision she asked me about my goals.  I don't think what I told her was accurate.

What I wanted ten years ago has changed without me realizing it. Ten years ago I wanted to be a strong competitor in the dressage ring; I wanted to ride every day; I wanted to train, train, train. And ten years ago I did all of that. Well, except for the strong competitor part. I went to a lot of shows and I worked really hard, getting up in the dark to ride before work, my nose dripping in the cold morning air.  And I loved it.

I don't want that anymore. I want to improve and progress but more than anything I want a horse that I can have at home; a horse that I can work with on my own, taking occasional lessons to keep me on track; a horse that I trust. Winston is not that horse.

My new job is very demanding; both in terms of time and energy.  I enjoy it but it doesn't leave me time to ride during the week.  I want a horse that can hang out in the pasture during the week and cruise around the arena or trail on the weekend.

Tuesday, the vet came to the barn and did a thorough evaluation of Winston. I wanted to rule out pain as the cause of his reactive behavior. I wanted to check everything before making a decision. She said that Winston is sore, but not any more sore than would be expected with the work he is doing. Certainly not sore enough to justify throwing himself around. She felt that his behavior is tied to his personality.  It's a great personality for a competition horse -- brave and willing with a strong, but sensitive, rider.

To a large degree, he has my number. He is trying to dominate me; to be the alpha. It doesn't work on the ground. I've always been able to firmly establish my space and my position on the ground. Winston is no trouble at all in that area. But in the saddle its a different story. He's a very talented and fun horse to ride in a lesson but he scares me on my own. There. I've said it. I'm scared of coming off again.  I'm 54 and my joints hurt.  I'm too old to deal with young horse behavior.  Especially with a strong willed horse.

Sandy is pleased with the progress that Winston is making. She calls him the "new" Winston. If I were still focused on shows and advancing and had the drive that consumed me when I was younger, it might be worth making the financial sacrifices to keep him in full training. But I'm not willing to go into debt, and I'm not willing to eat weenies and beans for dinner in order to progress. Winston's training has been blowing through our savings at an alarming rate. It can't continue much longer and I can't safely bring him home. He needs an owner who is where I was ten years ago.

I need to re-evaluate my goals as well. I told Sandy that my goal was to get a bronze medal. I'm not sure, on reflection, that it is my goal anymore. I want a horse who is kind, willing, sensitive and sound. I love dressage and that will always be the discipline I practice but I'm not sure I want to concentrate on competition. I want to enjoy the journey and the relationship.

Not What I Had in Mind

After running errands this morning, Brett and I drove down to see Winston.  The plan was an easy walk-trot ride, with a relaxing hack through the back pastures afterwards.

It didn't work out that way.

Winston stood still while I mounted, we walked off, and he started to crow-hop and then to half-rear.  So, I got off.

Are we going back to my stall where I'll get cookies and carrots and lunch?

No, Winston.  We are going to the round pen.  You are going to work.

Work?  Hah!  I'm going to buck and fart and blow you off.  

Your choice, Winston.  Wlithout a lunge line I can't do much to make you pay attention to commands.  But I can make you keep working until you relax and tune in.

After hosing Winston off (he had worked up a mighty sweat) and putting him away, Brett and I headed to one of the wineries in Amador County.  It was on the way home.  And I needed a glass of wine.

Random Five Friday

1. We've had very weird weather this week. Monday night and Tuesday morning we had snow. Wednesday and Thursday were cloudy and comfortable. This evening when I drove up the driveway, I noticed piles of white on the roof of the house; three distinct piles. I put my foot on the brake, stopped, and stared. Tuesday, the snow had turned to rain mid-morning. It rained all day and there was no trace of snow left by evening. It was 44F when I got home; not cold enough for snow. I looked at the ground and noticed piles of white pebbles. Mystery solved. As I walked to the house with a bag of groceries, I called to Brett who was mucking Flash's stall, "When did it hail?" He called back, "just a few minutes ago." Tomorrow should be clear and cool; Sunday they are saying we will be in the 70s. April is unsettled here in the Sierras.

2. Yesterday, Winston had an appointment with a therapist; a cross between physical therapy and a massage. She said that he was sore but that the soreness was recent and superficial, consistent with being in work. He was very interested in her pockets. I suspected cookies. I was wrong. She had small vials of oil infused with different scents. He liked the lavender one but his favorite was one labeled "trauma." She unscrewed the cap and waved the bottle under his nose. He followed it all the way back to her pocket. She had five or six "flavors" but he only liked the two; and he liked them a lot. He was very entertaining while she worked on him; alternating between sleepy eyed relaxation and yawning to release tension.

3. The therapist also checked pressure points -- similar to acupuncture but using pressure instead of needles. When she pressed on the points that connect to the stomach, he flinched and yanked his foot away from her. All compass points seem to be pointing to ulcers.

4. Today after work, I took Winston for a walk around the barn property. We started on the wide path that leads from the barn out to the dressage courts. The wide areas of grass on either side where I had been hand grazing Winston, had been mowed and the smell of fresh cut grass mingled with the smell of rain. We walked past the dressage courts onto a muddy lane that ran along side the back paddocks. At the end of the last paddock, a trail led to the top of a levy. We followed the levy down to a fence and then scampered back down to the other side of the paddocks taking a single track trail back to the dressage courts. The grass was knee high so we slowed to a crawl while Winston greedily ripped at the grass and the dandelions.

5. Tonight for dinner we had a working woman weeknight dinner staple: stir fried vegetables over rice. I forgot to take a picture of the finished product -- we were hungry and dove right in. Bok choy, kale and a variety of mushrooms; a little garlic and ginger, salt and pepper. Simple. Fast. Tasty.

Winston Thoughts

I'm sure it isn't a surprise to you that I spent most of last night thinking about Winston.  The more I thought, the more I became convinced that he may very well have ulcers.  Sandy had mentioned the possibility Thursday and it makes a lot of sense.



1.  Winston was not reactive the first year after I bought him.  He was forward and sensitve but also level headed.  He tried hard.  He couldn't wait to go to work; always meeting me at the gate.  I took him to a couple shows and he was solid as a rock, even in cold freezing wind that drove most of the other competitors to scratch.



2.  Then we moved.  He was already a bit more reactive, but still a happy partner.  I think that even though he enjoyed the shows, being there with all the noise and activity was stressful.  It was a far cry from his peaceful paddock life.  The move to our present home involved a very long trailer ride.  I've tried to block out exactly how long; but I'm guessing it was in the neighborhood of ten hours.  Then he had to adjust to a new place.



3.  Winston didn't settle in peacefully.  He harrassed Jackson in the pasture so we had to separate them.  Then he started goading Mufasa.  When we were finally settled enough that I could ride again, I had lost six months.  He was belligerant and hard to catch.  He started resisting work.  I was baffled.  Where did my steady Eddy fun horse go?



4.  I trailered him down to take a few lessons with Sandy and we did well.  I loved how Sandy had me ride with focus and I loved how she used softness as a reward.  Winston seemed to be doing well.  I was feeling encouraged.  In answer to Kates (valid) concern, Sandy always goes to a very soft place- and stays there - as long as the communication is flowing.  The horses she trains are happy and relaxed.  This is not an issue of having the wrong trainer for Winston.



5.  Winston became more and more reactive; to the point where I didn't feel safe.  Initially, Winston made a lot of progress with Sandy and riding him was like being on a different horse.  He was soft and forward and fun.  But he still had reactive days and lately they've been increasing.  He flinches visibly when touched.  Sometimes, he does more than flinch.  In the past week, his demeanor has changed.



6.  The plan: a full course of ulcer medication; a full work up by the massage/acupressure therapist; ulcer prevention supplements and, lastly, more time with me.  Sandy will still work with him -- she is much clearer and I don't want confusion to add to his discomfort.  But, I plan to visit him in the evenings after work -- grooming, hand walking, hanging out.  We've been out of town the last few weekends with my  mom's memorial and my birthday, but I plan to spend more of my weekends with him now.  Some of you may remember Kalvin, a horse who stayed at Aspen Meadows for a little more than a year while healing from an injury.  He was a sweet horse, but he never bonded with us.  His heart belonged to his owner and he lived for her visits.  The difference in his attitude, the shine in his eyes and the spring in his step when she came to visit were impossible to miss.  I know Winston misses me; he tells me so when I visit.  I need to spend more time with him.

Random Five Friday

1.  The blog will be quiet this weekend.  My mom's memorial is Saturday.  I will be celebrating her life with my family and with her friends.  I want to talk about her at the gathering; to share a bit about our relationship and what she meant to me.  I want to but I'm not sure I'll make it through.  I'm going to give it my best shot though.  Wish me strength.

2.  We do not plan to put a cover on the chicken run to protect them from hawks.  We'll see how it goes.  They will have a large oak tree and the hen house for cover.  If hawks start raiding our flock, I'm sure Brett will come up with some kind of cover.  He is putting chicken wire all along the bottom.  We don't need raccoons pulling chicken heads through the fence.  Yes, they do that and it's gruesome.

3. There has been some discussion in the comments about Jackson and his metabolic syndrome; about his supplements and about the wisdom of letting him eat grass.  We don't believe that he has a metabolic condition after all.  We had him tested six ways to Sunday and all the tests came back negative.  I did put him on Cushings medication for a year since metabolic conditions can throw false negative lab tests -- it didn't make any difference.  Our vet up here thinks Jackson just has crappy feet.  His laminitis isn't progressing and he shows no other symptoms of metabolic imbalance.  His soles are super thin, they get soft when the ground is wet and voila, abscess city.  He gets a vitamin supplement to balance his hay.  Other than his feet, he's very healthy.  He's got a boot on -- a diaper and epsom salt poultice covered with bandage tape and a duct tape sole.

4.  I bought a bird feeder and hung it on a pole in my garden.  I can see it from the breakfast table and my kitchen window.  I have a pair of binoculars and a book on birds in the Sierras sitting close by.  Brett thinks I've gone off the deep end, constantly looking up birds.  I saw a mountain bluebird the other day so it must be spring.

5.  Sandy called and cancelled my lesson on Winston.  It seems he's taken naughty to a whole new level.  She felt it best (and I agree) that I not ride him until he gets past this tantrum stage.  She likened his behavior to a two year old; I don't want to do it! I don't! I don't!  But instead of banging his head on the floor (my little brother excelled at that one), he throws himself around the arena.  Sandy rides with a lot of tact and sensitivity so if he's pulling this with her, it's all about him.  We don't think its pain related since he's good as gold when the work is easy and only protests when she's asking for a bit more.  I'm sure he's sore; boot camp is hard work. That isn't an excuse for bad behavior.  I have asked that the body work person give him a treatment (massage, acupressure) and we'll see if she feels anything especially ouchy.  In the meantime, I'm very thankful for Sandy and for her working with Winston.  She believes he can do the work and he can be a good partner; he just needs to do some growing up in the attitude division first.

Welcome Spring

I know spring is still a few days away but today it was spring at Oak Creek Ranch.  The sun was warm, the daffodils were blooming and the grass was green.  We moved the horses into the clover pasture.  The got to work on the grass after licking their bowls of cereal clean.

After chores, we climbed into the truck and drove down to visit this guy.

Sandy was getting ready to load Releve when we arrived.  She was showing yesterday and today (75 both days at 3rd level).  She told me that she has started working with Winston at canter and he is not happy about going in a nice frame.  We were just getting ready to start work on Winston's canter before we moved so this is new work.  His canter is comfortable but he goes around like a giraffe, hollow in the back and head high.  No loose swinging back and no pushing into the bit.  And he likes it that way, thank you very much.  He's been pitching a fit with Sandy so she advised that I just do walk and trot work today.  He was the same way with learning to use his body in trot so I know he will get there.  In the meantime, I'll let Sandy deal with the tantrums and I won't encourage things by cantering like a giraffe.

We started working long and low.  Winston likes long and low.

He does not like the actual work part that comes after the warm up.  He ducks his head and tries to avoid working into the bit.  I am not pulling him into this rolker-looking frame.  He is doing this all by himself.

Winston, Winston, it's not going to work.  I squeeze him forward with my calves and squeeze my fingers as if I were holding a wet sponge.  Up with that poll buddy.  Time to work.

When he realized the old evasions were not going to work with the new me, he gave up and gave me some very nice trot work.  I love the way I ride now -- with half halts that mean something, with focus, and with determination.  I still reward with softness, of course, but when Winston resists I don't give in.  Patient persistence is paying off.

After our short bit of work (I have another cold and very little energy), we went for a relaxing walk around the back pastures.  I'm pretty run down -- very busy at work and not sleeping well.  My dreams are transitioning from disturbing to sad so I'm not as afraid to sleep.  Grief is hard.

We picked up some supplies for Brett's current project and headed home.

The horses were exhausted.  Grazing in the clover pasture under the warm spring sun wore them out.

Random 5 Friday

1.  Earlier this week, Brett was in the house relaxing with his lunch when he heard Flash call.  He didn't think much of it until our neighbor, Cindy, called and said that Mufasa was out.  Brett went out on the front porch and, sure enough, there was Mufasa on the wrong side of the front gate looking for a way back in.  The property is fully fenced and Brett knew Mufasa couldn't jump out.  He was stumped; how did Mufasa get out?

2.  A neighbor tried  to catch Mufasa but he is very wary of people he doesn't know and he took off up the dirt road that circles behind the property.  Mufasa followed the fenceline until he was behind the barn and could see Flash and Jackson.  Brett hiked all the way around, wondering if Mufasa would trust him enough to be caught.  Mufasa looked at Brett, took a step towards him, and froze.  He wasn't sure if he wanted to run or go to Brett, who was softly calling his name.  He dropped his head and went to Brett who slipped on his halter and walked him back around the property and in the front gate.

3.  Of course, the wheels were turning in Brett's head the whole time.  How the heck did Mufasa get out?  No one had come to visit or deliver mail so the gate had remained closed.  Or maybe not.  Brett remembered that the metal axle of the muck cart can activate the sensor that opens the gate.  Mufasa just got shoes back on his front hooves.  Maybe the metal in his shoes triggered the gate...  Brett walked Mufasa back and forth in front of the sensor and sure enough the gate opened.  Now we turn off the sensor when the horses are out.

4.  I had another excellent lesson on Winston tonight.  My job when I ride is to keep focused and keep him busy.  If I coast, Winston gets bored and starts thinking naughty thoughts.  So, I flex him in and I flex him out.  We do lots of transitions (I keep forgetting to keep my leg on the whole time so he doesn't get annoyed, darn it).  We even did some canter work.  My job at canter is to follow with my elbows.  I tend to lock up and restrict his movement.  After the lesson, I took him for a long walk, groomed him, turned him out in the sandy arena, and then let him hand graze.  It was good quality time; something we both needed.

5.  Many thanks to all of you for your words of support as I grieve for my mom.  She was the family glue and my best friend.  I miss her tremendously.  Many evenings, I just don't have it in me to write a post and I appreciate your understanding as I work my way back to some sort of normal.

Riding with Purpose

I had a lesson with Sandy today after work.  I kept checking my phone all day, expecting to get a text canceling the lesson due to heavy rain that fell most of the day.  Instead, I got a text asking if I wanted her to ride Winston for the first part of my lesson so I could see how he's doing.  I immediately accepted.  Rain was falling hard as I drove to the barn; with the windshield wipers on high I could barely see past the hood of the car.  The roads weren't flooded although the fields on either side of me looked like a network of ponds connected by streams.  Sandy said I was one of only two boarders who showed up at the barn all day.

We walked Winston to the covered arena and Sandy climbed on.  I settled into a chair in the corner, shivering in the cold despite my fleece shirt and windbreaker.  Brulee, Sandy's whippet, came over to say hello and pretty quickly found her way onto my lap.  She was nice and warm; a welcome companion.  I'm not familiar with the breed but she is a very sweet, serious dog with large round liquid eyes.  I was smitten by the time it was my turn to hop on Winston.

Sandy put Winston through his paces and he looked much more steady in the bridle.  He did kick out in the canter once but that was pretty minor compared to the high headed hopping he did for three laps in the beginning.  I watched and thought, Okay, that's better but the difference isn't huge.  And then I got on.

The difference was huge.  I was a bit nervous at first; I haven't ridden in two weeks and I could feel Winston's forward energy beneath me.  C'mon, woman, let's go!  In my last lesson, my brain was pinging around in my brain trying to coordinate my aids and trying not to worry about my mom who had just been admitted to the hospital. Winston had tested me the whole time, perhaps sensing that I wasn't on my game.  He was also pretty new to training with Sandy and not with the program yet.

Sandy told me that in the beginning, she walked on eggshells a bit with Winston.  He tended to try and pick a fight over everything.  But as he got more fit, and learned how to work with the bit instead of against it, she has been able to direct him more.  As Sandy said, he has more in his toolbox now.  My job today was to ride with purpose.  Winston was not allowed to dictate the ride, although he tried.  Rain was beating on the roof of the arena, creating a cocoon of sound as we worked.  Sandy's voice was in my ear (love riding with headphones) and I zoned everything out except the feel of Winston beneath me.

I did a much better job of keeping my hands correctly up and flexed.  My legs were softly against Winston's sides at all times, and I was able to relax my elbows into the flow of Winston's trot.  It felt effortless.  We were focused on each other and I was riding, directing, communicating and loving it.

Sandy told me to look in the mirrors as I went down the long side so I could see how good Winston and I looked together.  I could also see the difference between when he dropped his head low to evade honest work, and when I lifted his poll up higher.  Brett wasn't there to take pictures so Sandy snapped a few with her phone.  Isn't Winston looking great?

Soaking up the Sunshine

Just to be clear, there isn't any sunshine today.  We have cold, windy overcast skies; an occasional raindrop and a possibility of snow flurries.  But, we did have sunshine on Friday.  Brett caught the horse relaxing in the sun after a therapeutic roll in the mud.  Spa day at its best.

Tuffy and Finessa

Mufasa and Jackson

Jackson -- doing great.  I removed his fancy booties today.

Flash

Flash and Winston (last day at home - for awhile)

Nobody naps like Flash.  

Sleep -- ahhhh, bliss.